sihui trying to too herself here...for someone about to die, she looks waaaaaay too happy.. 

i'm proud of my master piece...i bao the turban for abel!!! haha i also uprooted(is there such a word?) alot of his precious locks! 

dnd's slackest trio...xi yi po, janice and i..haha we were nua-ing together the whole day!! either nua in the ballroom, in the hotel room, or at the make-up area...waa...doesn't janice look like an indian bride? 

woo....xiao bai the genie which comes out of the oil lamp! evil xi yi po is trying to murder my genie!!! there goes my 3 wishes! 

qianlu and xi yi po yiling..haha...in case its not obvious...we are trying to position our bodies to spell d-n-d 

my portfolio mates ELOs! stands for External Liaision Officers...sounds v seh hor..shihan and liankai...they always say i'm ELO chio-est...of coz la.. 

dinner and dance committee 2005! DOUBLE CONFUSED!! 

wo shi mei de..

today, someone told me that i am very pretty.

she made my day.

simply because a compliment about my looks from another girl is worth more than a million guys telling me the same thing.

and i realize...

that i don't know how to react to compliments

momo tomorrow...i can't wait.

oblivious.

rather than being on the

DEFENSIVE,

why not be on the

OFFENSIVE?

does it feel better to strike out than to receive blows? why don't i strike first to reduce hurt, rather than sit and wait for an attack on my feelings? why don't i armour myself with a hard heart, with aloofness and with indifference. will that cushion me against an oblivious attacker?

my head hurts.

i hate seperations

there are 2 songs in the world which i hate alot..at the same time, i really love listening to them!!!

"graduation" by Vitamin C and "dang ni gu dan ni hui xiang qi sui" by xin shao nian ju le bu

especially when it is nearing THAT part of my life...i hate seperations.

my thoughts..

in response to angeline's wish about the perfect world..peace, love, kindness, tenderness...

in this world, if u notice, things come in pairs...eye..ears..boobs...hahaha...

anyway, in this world..there is a reason why things happen. why there is war, why there is selfishness, why there is anger....

there cannot be peace without war...for you wouldn't appreciate the goodness of peace time, if you have never experience the horros of war

there cannot be ultimate love without hatred, for there is no foil to the greatness of love, there will be no recognition of love.

there cannot be kindness or gratitude, if you have not experienced selfishness and nastiness, for you will not be appreciative

will things ever be the same again?

let me tell you the story of 2 friends.

once, there were 2 friends who see each other virtually everyday. they had fun daily and did things together. stuff like shopping, chatting, eating, attending classes. they stuck together. soon there was a school break. soon there was a drift.

for 1 of them found a new friend.

an interesting, spontaneous and charming friend. a superior replacement. things will never be the same.

the drift became clear to the other, for there were no more invitations to meet, little contact, and much less conversations. when they meet, there was little chance to be alone with her friend. for there was someone else to shop with, hang out with, watch movie with. ey she hang on and pretended not to notice. she tried to hide the hurt, the complains and she adapted. gradually, she gained a little of her friend back but she still had to share. things will never be the same.

when school starts again, things became hectic. there was no time to play, no time for herself and even less time for others. a hectic schedule means disappointment to her friends, her family. even to her runaway friend. until one day thngs turn around and the runaway friend accused her of neglect. but there was nothing to be done. only profuse apologies and a hope for understanding. things will never be the same.

this is the story of 2 friends.

merlion.

club momo

large, spacious, freezing cold and free entry. until the crowd sets in from 930pm onwards. by 10plus, there is virtually no place to stand without feeling off, coz all corners and table, bar counters..any place to lean on is covered by bodies. i like the idea...of a large venue, with different sections. a pool secton, a soccer section with a large screen tv, a dance floor(too small though..), a seperate section for live band, but unfortunately, the toilet is at 1 end. i want in, i want to be 1 of the shareholders. i think they earn v well. though there is free entry b4 10pm, the drinks sell well. a bottle of chivas(now, a taboo word) is about...$240? memebrship is about...$300? 1 huge problem is, as it gets late, it gets TOO crowded to move to the toilet, much less DANCE. it was that squeezy.

1 bottle of chivas. 2 jugs of vodka ribena.

1 drunk girl. 1 woozy girl. 1 steady girl. 1 zhai girl. 2 worried old men.

1 who loves to dance WITH the table. 1 who loves to dance IN the curtains. 1 who keeps peeing. 1 who don't get to play.

drip drip drip.

mom insisted i went home for lunch once sat.duno why i was super tired (i slept at 1145pm the previous night n woke at 9am) and on my way home on the train, i actually fell asleep. people who know me well will know that i don't sleep on public transports easily.guess i was really tired!(have been tired recently..damn..rapid aging?)at the same time, i was starving.hence, i dreamt..and i dreamt of..FOOD!yes i was THAT hungry.when i i fnally awoke(manage to be very zhun and wake up just as the train was approaching my stop)i found that i was...drooling. juz a little...but all the same EMBARRASSING. wonder if anyone noticed, coz lucky for me, those people standing around em were facing the other way. nevertheless..YIKES!

i need motivation.

i need motivation. i have a confession to make: i skipped 1 lesson (the only lesson of the day) and went shopping. alone. never mind that the shopping trip only lasted 30min, never mind that there was no intention to go shopping before i skipped lesson. i have been feeling odd of late..muz be the time of the month again! dun feel like doing my readings, fulfilling basic responsibilities in proj dicussions, attending classes or simply being IN ntu. just don't feel lik it. feel like sleeping forever, eating bread ( i know, how to eat bread and sleep at the same time right?), also don't feel like smiling much...basically, don't seem tio have much energy and somehow, worse than usual bad memory. forgot to bring along impt stuff like wallet, keys and mp3 player when i go home..more than once! help! i need some motivation man...and some bread please..

s.t.r.e.s.s.

if i have made the right choice, then why do i find myself wondering if i have made the right choice? confusing? but its as simple as it gets. many times i find myself wondering...am i really cut out to be an accountant? i have much difficulty understanding the underlying principles of accounting, can't seem to THINK like an accountant, don't seem to get the logic, and worst of all, just don't get bonds and securities..i always wonder...will i be better off taking engineering? afterall, my strength lies in mathematics (though i am mediocre by most standards..damn..). the feelings are further intensified when i attempt my readings and managed not to get whatever the chim text is trying to tell me. furthermore, attending lessons lowers my morale inch by inch..and not to mention doing projects with the zhai ple..i am SOOO NOT motivated to do my stuff! can't help thinking back on JC days where despite not being able to solve a complicated math problem, i will stick to it and work it till i can get it right. i wonder where my drive has gone to. where has the thirst for knowledge gone to? actually come to think fo it, it has not gone anywhere. coz i simply do not have a thirst for knowledge. things are not helped by the fact that i am a chao slacker, lazy ass and miss dependent. i also can't do any things at the same time. worst of all, all the projects just come TOGETHER.

i have a 4 day week and wed is my free day. everyone says its damn slack but picture a typical week for me. mon: 3 hours lesson. at least another 2 hours proj. tues: 4 hours lesson 1030 - 230. AA206 proj reading. AA205 proj discussion. wed: free day! 2 hours BM321 proj discussion. typeout of AA205 proj proposal. thurs: 2 hours of lesson. god-knows-how-long hours of AA206 proj discussion, coz i am doing proj with 3 other gods. STRESS. fri: 6 hours of lesson, in between, got to meet for proj again.

on top of all these FIXED "engagements" , i have to do the normal readings and tutorials(which i haven't been touching!) and research for each proj, studying of financial statements and analysts reports, coz i CANNOT go for proj discussion with no brains and no information..and if i am unlucky, got to present tutorial qn..i have also been neglecting my FYP COMPLETELY, as i can't find the time! feel so guilty towards my fellow fyp mates, as i am causing the group to lag behind. though they obviously have the same projects as i do, somehow i can't seem to take out any time! alot ple have been asking me "why u look so stressed recently?"

oh man...i need a fairy godmother..

smokey smokey

i was watching tv at home one day last week, minding my own business when i smell something suspicious..again..

me: eh wei an arh...i think you should go check out the food you're cooking lo...

wei an: aiyah..its not burning la..sweet potatoes cant burn lo (but just in case, walks towards the kitchen and opens the oven door

*black smoke escapes from the oven*

me: (looking at the black smoke wafting out) so...potatoes cant burn eh? (trying to hide my evil laughter) i'm going to close the door arh..same drill...u can escape from other side

toxic.

have you ever had a love-hate relationship with someone? i realized recently, that i have 2 friends like that, both girls of coz.

girl a...sticks to me only when she needs me. in fact..both does la. but girl a stuck to me for about 1 year, and the moment we grad, she doesn't need me anymore and hence, not in contact any longer, though we're in the same Uni. when we see each other, depending on her mood, she'll either go "öei" or "halo!" or " " (which is pretend nvr see). so when we have class gathering and i know she feels very off, i only go "halo" and run off with my real friends. why should i bother when she doesn't?

girl b...is an interesting girl. so interesting that i don't know if she likes me or hates me. we had a misunderstanding(over a guy of all reasons, and it was probably all in her imagination) and hence before we can establish a proper friendship, everything went down hill. i kept getting the feelng that she was trying to leave me out of everything, and being very secretive around me. though i finally found out why, our friendship never resumed. other things happened which made me lose my faith and tarnish my impression of her. soon my aloofness became dislike, and now i don't even feel like speaking to her. i wonder if its my own prejudice or the circumstances. but i truly think she has done something really bad. if it is true, then she is really a huai4 nu3 ren2.

however i do have soft spots for both of them. when people criticise them, i will definitely speak up if i feel they are wronged. why? i have no idea. could be that after all, there were once my friends.

do u have such friends too?

lemon 1000

"hi do you want to try? its a new drink by pokka. each bottle has 1000mg of vitamin C, equivalent to 12 lemons."

i said this like 5 million times within 2 days. did personal canvassing last weekend with rx,terry-ble and alvin tan. managed to see alot of babes and hunks with great bods..and realized that i am more interested in the female best abs contest than i am in the men's category. oops. the men...no eye candy there u see. all they have are great bods. sad to say, i am a looks-girl..so i do care about looks! no need some handsome guy, no need to be tall or tanned. as long as he's got good skin and i can stand loking at his face for pro-longed period of time. haha..but thats hard to find! and terry is really terrible..he asked rx n i "why is it that in the 2 years in hall, you don't find a bf?" isn't that another way of saying "there must be something wrong with u" or "why are you still single? HAHAHA!"

our job was to give out drinks sample and sell the bottle drink. seems easy, but wait till the ugly side of singaporeans reveal themselves.though there are people who refuse to try, there are more people who not only try, they try alot.u can never poor fast enough coz sometimes people just rush up to the booth and ask to try, either that or some people just can't get enough. they try so many times, and ask to fill up their cups. what the..? and there was this uncle..wa liew..he came for both days and everytime, ask us to fill the cup to the brim and drank so many times.i was so peeved that i told him "uncle since u like it so much and came for both days, why don't you buy some home?" i think i managed to shock alvin haha..first time he see me so hostile. another thing which makes rx and me blood boil is the boss. she has no sense of artistic direction and insist we do up the booth in cartain ways. hengwe didn't listen to her for everything. not only so, she has no common sense, and no proper system to get things done. everything is so messy and haphazard. she also has no sense of TIME. we were supposed to report at 630pm and she only met us at 7pm for a supposed briefing. in the end, it was not a briefing but to decorate and arrange the stall. we were supposed to start work at 10am but she got here at 11plus. she's supposed to come back at 2pm plus so rx and i can go have lunch. she got back at 6pm and act surprised that we haven't eat lunch. halo!!! u only asked the guys to go eat!!! and when there are 3 of us at the booth, 1 should keep pouring samples and the other 2 serve right? she insist on being the 1 to pour and rx and i serve. but she keeps running back to sit and count money. so who pour? when rx and i go pour, she'll rush out and say u 2 go serve.i'll pour. duh! so angry!!!

however, we do have some fun. when theboss is not around of coz! which is most of the time la. coz she'll disappear to god knows where. we joke around, laugh at the contestants and performers on stage..eat mash potatoes and hop over to our neighbours to eat noodles etc..and the pay was not bad, coz she did not try to cut our hours (though she was not here to check) and for that we give her credit la. though shes not the 1 paying the wages. haha. in all, maneged to make some extra cash, which i promptly spent it on shoes...diao...bought 2 pairs of heels thogh i KNOW they'll give me pain and blisters, and i cant take bus in it...who wants to drive me?

fulfiling day.

i had a fulfiling day today. bright and early, we had tennis lessons for 2 full hours. feels good to move about and also a chance for chel and i to refresh our memory and brush up on our tennis skills. kim and buddy are the newcomers, and though its only the first lesson, we declare that Kim is Julie biscuits no. 2. when she swings the racket, i can HEAR the wind! poor dakun..if they ever have a domestic quarrel, he sure die under a well welded frying pan. after a good workout (for me and chel, coz the coach THOUGHT we already mastered the basics and made us run and catch..), i headed back to sch for 2 proj meetings. i felt so popular that day, as supposedly i have 3 meetings at 2pm, 2.30pm and 3pm. so to ensure i did get something done, i had to cancel on my dear fyp mates..coz the pressure frm mr yang is really stressful. following the meetings is a super duper sucky lecture. thankfully, its the first and last one. the tutor who looks lik a caucasian but seems to be speaking tamil.i really couldn't understand him in the first 10min. everytime someone packs the bag and walks out of the lecture theatre, everyone else will look at him/her with envy. hai...pure waste of time huh. however,following that, we had havoc dinner! at pan pacific! omg..the food was really great, and it costs $56 per pax. it was pure heaven for people who eat raw oysters and salmon sashimi. as for me, i love the fresh prawns in tom yum soup! yum! and also the mussels (cooked 1s..)..it is also the first time i like the taste of beef steak. and the stir fry veggies..such a simple dish, but such great taste..wish i can cook that..and the desserts...well..the wide array of sweets are super tantalising..haha..mini cakes, brownies, puudings, ice-cream..pure heaven!